Crazy Cat Lady Crystal Art Is Real And It’s Everything You Dreamed It Would Be

I don’t know what it says about me that an ad for Paint With Diamonds data analyzed itself into my Instagram feed, but I am so glad it did and now you will be, too.

(This post contains affiliate links because of course it does, people. If I’m going to bring something this incredibly bananas into your life I DESERVE MY CUT.)

Move over, cross stitch, and make way for a new generation, because the cool cat ladies now are replacing canvas and counting with JEWEL BY NUMBER masterpieces. Watch and be amazed:

LOOK AT THE SHIMMERING GLORY! All I want in life is to have enough of these completed masterpieces in my home to complement my extensive collection of silk flower arrangements and decorative baskets.

As a marketer, I really appreciate that unlike some of its competitors (yes! There are multiple options for diamond painting kits!), Paint With Diamonds straight-up refers to its crystals as “diamonds” despite the fact that they are neither diamond-shaped nor, presumably, formed by colossal forces of heat and pressure deep within the earth and then carried up to the surface over time through volcanic activity.

Sounds great, you’re probably thinking, but are there enough cat designs? Fair question, and one I assume is on everyone’s mind as they browse these products. You’ll be reassured to know that my exhaustive search of the Paint With Diamonds website has yielded — in addition to many fine options featuring dragons and wolves and mystical fairy castles — not one, not eleven, but TWENTY-TWO PAGES OF RESULTS for the search term “cat.” There’s Curious Cat. And Shocked Cat. And Confident Cat (a cat of many colors!) and its regal friend Thinking Cat Crowned. There are cute kittens and sassy cats wearing clothes just like people and even a Johnny Cash tribute cat. And if that weren’t enough, every single image in this post is available as a diamond art kit on Amazon.

Don’t see a cat you like? Not to worry. You can get a custom diamond canvas made and bedazzle your own mother-loving cat.

What if I don’t like pictures of cats? I’m obviously kidding. No one who likes art this beautiful could possibly be a cat hater. But just in case, here’s one for you:

If you haven’t, by this point, tossed out your tired colored pencils and your Relax With Scenes From Babette’s Feast adult coloring book and directed Apple Pay to immediately purge your checking account in pursuit of rhinestone fantasy scenes, I guess that’s your choice, but I don’t have to understand it. Good luck keeping up at your next fancy professional cocktail party when everyone else is debating the merits of square vs. round drill. I can’t force you onto the cool kids train — I can just offer you the ticket.

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